I don't get this product. Really. I mean, I got it—I bought it—and I like it, but I don't get it. First, who's the target customer? Some dweeb for whom an entire cracker is too dainty, but an entire pretzel is too macho? Some hand-wringing doofus who stands at the open pantry for half an hour, conducting an inner executive-decision debate over pretzel vs. cracker? Some idiot who's susceptible to any kind of snack-food brand extension? (If so, mission accomplished.)
Second, what led to its creation? I don't see a think-tank sitting around in Kellogg's HQ parsing reams of data, and suddenly Dave from marketing pounds his fist on the table and says, "Dammit, what this country wants is a horizontally aligned cracker-pretzel hybrid!" No one-bite-of-cracker-one bite-of-pretzel shenanigans, no sir: no yin-yang swirlicue-looking thing that will allow easy separation, but a new snack combo, indivisible, with liberty and mustard for all.
I don't buy that for a second—not after opening the box and seeing the things. I picture something more along the lines of a huge industrial accident: running, waving of arms, shrieks of "Oh my God!" and "They're ruined!" I picture some mad Doctor Frankenstein standing before an ocean of semi-blackened crackers, tens of millions of dollars circling the toilet bowl. The company is on the line. Suddenly, he rips a fistful of bushy hair in orgasmic inspiration: "Gentlemen...the Flipside is alive! ALIVE!"
Here's the real question: Is the Flipside a pretzel chip that baked too little on one side, or a Townhouse cracker that narrowly missed getting nuked to ashes? Forget that neat little object on the package. The ones in my box are clearly pretzel on one side, but the other side, though somewhat lighter and flakier, has visible scorch marks. And as with so many culinary accidents, the slightly burned taste is what makes it addictive, like the hint of ruin that offsets the sweetness of caramel. What's more, it has a hard, al dente crunch almost like a kettle-cooked chip. How would they reproduce whatever catastrophe produced this thing?
What does the Flipside say about me, the consumer? That I am a gullible, easily diverted, pathologically indecisive glutton with a subconscious nostalgia for the vinyl 45. To which I can only respond: I gotta be me.