Wednesday, February 20, 2008

A Memo From Investor Relations

Posted by on Wed, Feb 20, 2008 at 7:57 AM

I think most people agree that corporate documents outlining quarterly earnings don’t include enough discussion of milk shakes. Which is why this press release from the Chattanooga-based Krystal Company is so endearing.

The 75-year-old burger chain posted record earnings for 2007, and officials attribute much of the recent success to the introduction of the MilkQuake line.

“Krystal's new MilkQuake line, featuring premium ice cream and all natural flavors, was an immediate hit when introduced in May,” says Krystal president and CEO Fred Exum, whose name is oddly reminiscent of a purple pill prescribed for GERD. “The made-to-order milk shakes fueled profits during all dayparts and as a snack-time treat.”

Having enjoyed my share of Quakes during all dayparts—usually as a chaser to a GERD-inducing meal in the driver's seat of a minivan, I can’t speak for Krystal’s bottom line, but I can assure you that the Quake is responsible for significant accretion of my own assets.

The MilkQuake is in short, a damn fine specimen, and I would hold up the chocolate version (without the dollop of whipped cream polymer, please) against any of the best local contenders. In fact, I see a Mr. Pink’s® Death Match between Krystal’s MilkQuake and the previous champion of the Scene's so-called Straw Poll.

In the meantime, Krystal plans to roll out six to eight new limited-time MilkQuakes in 2008. Any suggestions for flavors?

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