Well, another day on the cleanse (see "When Life Gives You Lemons," below) and I'm still recovering from the dream I had last night. I was sitting in a restaurant eating chicken and suddenly realized I had forgotten about Master Cleanse. Sheer panic! Then I woke up, had another lovely 32-oz. saltwater milk shake (well, saltwater water shake is more accurate, but the other way sounds so much more enticing), regained my composure and forged ahead. As did my insides.
One tip for prospective cleansers: as of this writing, organic lemons at Wild Oats were $1.49 per lemon. At Turnip Truck, which charges by the pound ($3.69), I bought seven organic lemons (all roughly the same size as the Wild Oats lemons, and with labels indicating they're from the same purveyor) for $7.80 before tax. Those same lemons would have cost me $10.43 before tax at Wild Oats. So Turnip Truck is your best bet if you want to go organic. (If you think this diet is going to save you money, think again.)
As Homer Simpson famously said, "Mmmm...pork chops."